If you’re like me, you’re a Scandal-izer; this means that you’re hooked on Shonda Rhimes’ amazing new show, Scandal. It’s captivating; it’s fascinating; it has all the right elements. In fact, it’s a definite winner this season! I needed to put that out there before I delve into my topic.
If you watched the show’s last episode, you definitely got a glimpse into how the Olivia-Fitz relationship began. For those who haven’t seen it yet, I promise there’ll be no spoilers here so feel free to keep reading :-) While watching the show, I noticed that comments on the show were blowing up on Twitter. The comment that continually stood out to me was how much “chemistry” Olivia and Fitz have. Let’s forget for a second that this is fiction and Kerry Washington (who plays Olivia Pope) and Tony Goldwyn (who plays President Fitz Grant) are amazing actors who have perfect on-set chemistry, this “chemistry” comment is very fascinating to me. My reason may be obvious: Fitz is married and Olivia is/was (that remains to be seen) his mistress. Chemistry between any two lovers in an illicit relationship is never more than lust to me – it just isn’t the real deal! Want to know why I think so? Here’s why: it is extremely easy to have “chemistry” with someone when you go to that person only as a temporary fix. You know, in those moments when you just want someone to talk to or a warm body next to you? What happens in relationships like this? You spend just a bit of time together, you leave, and you go home to your real life. Because this person isn’t really a part of your real life, it’s very easy to enjoy these stolen moments because these moments are pure fantasy.
You know what’s real chemistry? Sharing children, bills and a roof with someone – constantly – and falling into each other’s arms at the end of a long day with love and commitment to each other. Real chemistry is staying committed to the one you vowed to love forever even when the bitter winds of life’s problems come along. Real chemistry is fighting to keep the fire of love lit for that person everyday because you never want your love to be mundane. What real chemistry is not is stolen moments from someone who is never the one present when life gets hard because she only gets to see the good side of you. Real chemistry, my friends, is work – but it is loving work :-)
One thing I’ve noticed is that the media is far more likely to show this fake chemistry. (Again, I absolutely love Scandal and I have no gripe with the storyline) This was often at the back of my mind until I saw a movie that brought it fiercely to the forefront. I watched a 2010 movie called Repo Men, starring Jude Law and Forest Whitaker. In the movie, Jude’s character and his wife become separated because of something little – an easily fixable thing that his wife wants from him but he won’t give. Yet, in the same movie, his character darn well goes to the ends of the earth for another woman that he just met and barely knew. Somehow, Jude’s character seems to be willing to do much more for this random woman than he is willing to do for his wife and the mother of his child. That really really annoyed me.
They say that “art imitates life” but in today’s world, I also know that life is imitating art more than ever. I wonder if we’ll become desensitized to certain things as a society because of the frequency with which certain images and words are fed to us. There are few movies and TV shows that make marriage look sexy, but there are so many that make infidelity (or just a relationship that definitely isn’t leading to marriage) look so sexy that we might start to mistake real love for fake chemistry. I surely hope not!
That said, I look forward to the next expisode of Scandal with anticipation. I did say I really love that show. I just hope that we balance some of the fictional images and sounds with the positive real thing because what our eyes see and our ears hear shapes our thoughts. Since our thoughts directly affect our behavior, let’s make those thoughts right, pure and true.
{photos: abc.com/scandal}
Thanks so much for saying what’ s been on my mind!! This is real life. Infidelity is NEVER ok.
Thanks for your comment, Serena. That’s exactly how I feel :-) It never is!
Great article. Thanks for writing it. On the night of the show, I conversed on Facebook with one of my friends. I was saddened by how glamorously they portrayed adultery. That “one minute” challenge and agreement that they developed was sad and unrealistic. It was sad because it would be marvelous for the married couple to have the warm one minute in the midst of a day of work and children. It was unrealistic because, between the unmarried, it often does not stop at one minute. The lust of the moment would give in to 2 minutes, 5 minutes and then a long time of regret.
I was excited about the show because I love Kerry Washington. She is very talented and I can still hardly pass by an airing of Ray without slowing down to watch it…again and again!! I was SO EXCITED about Scandal, but I am disappointed at her role. She plays a powerful and smart woman….. who is still a mistress. Maybe a change in plot is on the way.
I am a wedding planner and I love your magazine. I am delighted to see the images that you place on screen and I am grateful for today’s blog post! Thanks.
Thanks for your comment, Parthenia! You are so right. Adultery is often glamorized on TV in this day which is sad. I love your comment, “It was unrealistic because, between the unmarried, it often does not stop at one minute. The lust of the moment would give in to 2 minutes, 5 minutes and then a long time of regret.” That is so true!
I still really enjoy the show though because I do understand that it’s fiction. Thanks for your appreciation for what we do :)
Love the show, more please?