Calling Off a Public Engagement: Kelly Rowland & Lessons Learned

Many times, I’ve heard people say, and seen them write, the words, “failed engagement.” As I’ve (hopefully) matured through the years, I’ve realized that there is no such thing as that. Two people get engaged because one or both of them feel that they are ready and willing to overlook each other’s flaws and hold on to each other’s strengths long enough to be married to each other-preferably for the rest of their lives.

However, getting engaged does not mean that a relationship has come to a grand fairy tale halt. It is more than just a time to show off the ring and plan a wedding. Instead, getting engaged is just another step on the relationship journey. If at any point, one or both of the parties realizes that s/he is not ready to make that forever-and-ever committment, it is very reasonable (even wise) to discuss the possibility of waiting a bit longer. Instead of viewing this as a failure, I would dare to say that it is an absolute success! As someone who values marriage and marital vows, I believe it is far better to call off an engagement than to be miserable in marriage. Though marriage is no fairy tale, it is beautiful and is meant to be enjoyed. No point missing out on that!

This month, the very beautiful singer, actress and current X-Factor UK judge, Kelly Rowland, is on the cover of Cosmopolitan UK. In the magazine, she speaks about many personal things. In particular, she shares the humiliation she felt when she and her then-fiance, retired football player Roy Williams, decided to call off their engagement in 2005. Already a painful time, Kelly’s worldwide fame obviously made it even more difficult. To add more fuel to an already huge flame, the beautiful singer had just posed for the cover of Modern Bride magazine. Talk about tough! Yet, she found the courage to do what was right for her because she felt that they were too young to marry and didn’t know enough about each other to do so.

Kelly’s decision is a great lesson that: it’s okay to take things slowly; it’s okay to realize that the fact that you begin something does not mean that you have to follow through with it if you don’t feel right about it; and that it’s okay (actually, it’s necessary) to do what is right for you in spite of what the world might say about you. Those are great lessons learned!

Do you agree?

{Image Credit: Kelly Rowland}